Inconvenienced
by Ellivia
Summary: House & Cuddy deal with some issues from their past which has a significant impact on their future. Minor spoilers for Alone, so consider yourselves warned!
1. Chapter 1

-1"Oooo, the new Spill Canvas album comes out this Tuesday." The leggy blonde teen announced to no one in particular as she continued stocking the shelves with copies of Britney Spears' latest flop of an album.

"God, your taste in music disgusts me." another girl replied, impatiently digging through the bin of discounted CDs as she waited for her friend Whitney to finish what she was doing so they could go out back and smoke a joint.

"They happen to be an extremely talented band thank you very much," Whitney argued defensively. "Their sound is unique, their lyrics are incredibly profound, and they're…"

"So damn Emo, it makes me want to slit my wrists!" the brunette groaned, grinning when she saw the irritated look on her friend's face. "But I suppose that is their intended purpose…"

"Shut up, Lexie." the blonde sneered before turning her attention back to stocking the shelves. "You're just bitter because no one under the age of forty listens to that old fuddy duddy seventies rock music you like."

"I can't help it if the youth of today prefer to damage their eardrums listening to crap like…" Lexie paused, grinning to herself in satisfaction as she pulled a copy of Spill Canvas' debut album out of the discount bin and handed it to her friend "… like this."

"Are you sure you're really sixteen?" Whitney mumbled under her breath as she tossed the CD aside.

"That's what my newly acquired learner's permit says," Lexie replied glibly, flipping open her wallet and flashing the laminated ID card. "What about yours? Oh, that's right." she grinned. "You haven't gotten one yet."

"God, you're annoying." Whitney sighed, rolling her eyes in frustration. "Why are we friends again?"

"Because you find my charm and wit a refreshing change from all the other mindless drones that live in this Godforsaken town." Lexie replied confidently. "That and I have weed."

"Weed that I paid for!" Whitney reminded her.

"Well, it didn't magically roll itself ya know." Lexie argued, reaching into her pocket and pulling out a perfectly rolled spliff.

"Put that away!" Whitney gasped, glancing around the store to make sure no one was watching them. "If my boss sees that, he'll kill me."

"It's two o'clock, you're officially on break." Lexie declared, pointing at the clock nonchalantly. "Whatever illegal narcotics you choose to recreationally consume on your own time is none of his business."

"Is that how things work at your job?" Whitney asked, grinning in satisfaction at the look of irritation on Lexie's face. "Oh that's right. You don't have one."

"It wasn't my fault they fired me." Lexie mumbled.

"Whatever you say." the blonde replied, grinning triumphantly.

"Come on, let's go get stoned." Lexie muttered, already heading towards the back door of the shop and stepping out into the deserted alleyway. "I can't stand being sober in your presence for more than five minutes."

"The feeling is mutual." Whitney grinned, handing her friend a lighter and watching as the brunette expertly lit the joint before taking a long drag - releasing it moments later in a cloud of smoke.

"Take it easy there, Snoop." Whitney teased, eagerly plucking the tightly rolled spliff out of Lexie's fingers before taking a drag herself.

"Snoop aint got nothing on me." the brunette muttered confidently as she reached out to take the joint back, confused when she saw that her arm was shaking.

"Quit doing that, you're tripping me out." Whitney giggled, already feeling the affects of the weed.

"I'm not…" Lexie started to say when all of a sudden her eyes rolled to the back of her head and her entire body fell to the ground as she was wracked by a series of violent convulsions.

"Lexie?!" Whitney screamed in terror, crouching down beside her friend and gripping her flailing arms in an attempt to get her to stop shaking. "Lexie, what's wrong? What's happening?" the brunette's head continued to twitch from side to side on the cold pavement as blood began to poor out of her nose and mouth.

"Lexie!"

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

House sat in his office, legs leisurely crossed and feet propped up on his desk as he tossed the ball of rubber bands up into the air before catching it and repeating the motion. He was impressed with her creativity, not to mention her patience. Judging by the size and complexity of the ball, she must have been sitting in his office for quite a while. And she'd been snooping. House always kept his stash of elastic bands tucked away in the far reaches of his junk drawer so she must have had to do some serious digging. He didn't know why the thought of her riffling through his drawers was such a turn on, but with nothing else to do, he decided to let his mind wander. Closing his eyes, House imagined her expertly weaving each rubber band together. Her perfectly manicured fingers repeating the same motion over and over and over again…

She always had been good with her hands.

"Hard at work I see." Cuddy's voice interrupted his lascivious thoughts and he opened his eyes to see the object of his desire leaning casually against the office doorframe.

"I'm always _hard _at work when you're around." he grinned, looking her up and down appreciatively. She was wearing that red jacket again. The one that made her hair seem a few shades darker than usual and her eyes a few shades lighter. Not to mention that it hugged her curves in all the right places.

"You got your guitar back." Cuddy noted, ignoring his comment and motioning towards the expensive musical instrument as she sauntered over towards his desk.

"I did," House nodded, still playing with the rubber ball. It was quickly becoming his new favorite toy. "Ya know, that Dr. Wilson sure does seem to have an awful lot of time on his hands. You should probably speak to him about that."

"Oh, I plan to." Cuddy declared, her voice a combination of amusement and frustration. "Just as soon as we're done here."

"Uh oh, I feel a reprimand coming on." House replied sarcastically. "Should I get out the whips and chains?"

"That won't be necessary," Cuddy assured him, the tone of her voice lowering flirtatiously. "I have something else in mind for you."

"I'm listening." he leered, gazing up at her expectantly as though she were about to describe the most kinkiest sex act he'd ever had the pleasure of being 'punished' with.

"Alexis Wainwright." Cuddy declared simply, bringing her arm around to reveal the file folder she had been hiding behind her back. How had he not noticed that before?

Those fun bags of hers really were an unhealthy distraction.

"Huh?" House groaned in confusion, not to mention disappointment.

"Alexis Wainwright, age sixteen." Lisa continued, a small smile of satisfaction on her lips as she filled him in on the details of the case. "She was brought in yesterday afternoon suffering from an unexplained seizure that occurred while she and a friend were under the influence of marijuana."

"Sounds like an awesome trip," House grinned, making light of the situation to demonstrate his disinterest in the case. "Remind me to get the name of her dealer. I haven't been able to get my hands on the really good stuff since college."

"The only other notable symptom was a nosebleed," Cuddy went on to explain, ignoring his subtle reference to their days at Michigan U - but he noticed the way she averted his gaze. "There was also blood coming from the mouth, but it was later determined that the bleeding was caused by her inadvertently biting her tongue during the seizure."

"Ouch!" he winced, though the grin on his face showed no empathy towards the young girl's plight. "Well, that sure does sound like a fascinating case. Too bad I can't take it."

"And why is that?" Cuddy asked, eyebrow raised in question. He sighed.

"I hate to have to point out the obvious - _again_," House said impatiently. "But I don't have a team."

"You don't need a team, remember?" Cuddy argued, using his own words against him to prove her point. "Isn't that what you said?"

"Yes, but then _you_ said…"

"It doesn't matter what I said, you're taking this case." Cuddy declared authoritatively, leaving no room for argument. "As long as you remain on the payroll, I expect you to do more than just sit around playing with your balls all day."

"Careful, Dr. Cuddy." House grinned, deliberately placing the rubber ball down on his desk beside the oversized tennis ball. "It's comments like that which can often be misconstrued as sexual harassment."

"Pot, meet kettle…"Lisa trailed off, she didn't need to elaborate. House was the king of innuendo and they both knew it.

"Speaking of pot," he segued impressively. "Isn't it possible that this girl simply had an allergic reaction to the weed she was smoking?"

"That's one theory that should definitely be investigated." Cuddy replied and House could tell that she was being deliberately vague and unhelpful. Come on. Enable me, baby. You know you wanna.

"Is she a full fledged stoner, or was this her first time smokin the ganja?" House inquired, trying to chip away at her resolve. He even threw in a pout for good measure, but it was no use.

"I dunno," Cuddy shrugged indifferently as she turned to leave the room. "You'll have to ask her yourself."

"God, kill me now." House groaned in annoyance. He hated teenagers, almost as much as he hated their parents. "I suppose you expect me to talk to her mommy and daddy as well?"

"Nope, no parents." Cuddy informed him casually as she stood in the doorway prepared to leave. "She grew up in the system, we're still trying to track down her current foster mom. According to Alexis, she's at work."

"Splendid." House sneered. With any luck, he'd solve the case before the girl's fauxmom arrived at the hospital therefore saving him from the displeasure of having to interact with the parental unit.

"Try and behave yourself please," Cuddy warned, the grin on her face betraying the seriousness of her words. "Though from what I hear, this girl can more than hold her own."

"Whatever," muttered nonchalantly. "I've never met a teenage girl whose spirit I couldn't break."

"We'll see." Cuddy grinned ominously before leaving his office and sashaying down the hall. He had the distinct feeling that there was something about this case she wasn't telling him.

Suddenly intrigued despite himself, House grabbed his cane and limped out of the room.


	2. Chapter 2

-1I'm feeling so bad, and so good

I don't know what to do

- Terra Naomi 'The Vicodin Song'

Chapter Two:

"Nice cane." the oddly familiar voice of his young patient greeted House nonchalantly as he burst into the hospital room. He stopped dead in his tracks, staring at her suspiciously. She was sitting up straight in the bed, her back propped up against a large mound of pillows. Upon initial inspection, the girl seemed perfectly healthy. Though the pale complexion of her skin stood out in stark contrast to the dark curls that framed her face. And she was thin.

Too thin.

"Thanks." he muttered, puzzled by the abruptness of her words. She was looking at him expectantly, her gaze unwavering. House cleared his throat, unnerved by the young girl's curious demeanor.

He was supposed to be the weird one.

"Word on the street is that you had quite the little mary jane trip," House declared, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a bottle of his own drug of choice. "Was this your first time smoking a doobie?"

"That depends," Alexis replied coyly, her piercing blue eyes glaring at him suspiciously. "Are you a cop?"

"Hardly," House chuffed, expertly twisting open the childproof cap before dropping two vicodin pills into his mouth and swallowing them dry. "I'm a doctor."

"Interesting," the girl nodded, her gaze lowering to rake over his tall frame and House shifted uncomfortably under the intense scrutiny. "You don't exactly fit the image of a stereotypical doctor."

"I left my stethoscope at home," he mumbled irritably. Something about this girl had left House feeling extremely self-conscious - an emotion that was foreign to him. He needed to figure out what her angle was. She was way too intense for a sixteen year old, her clear blue eyes held the wisdom of a much older soul.

And why did she seem so goddamn familiar?

"So, are you gonna answer my question or not?" House barked impatiently, anxious to see if his gruff tone of voice would phase her at all.

"No." Alexis replied nonchalantly and a mischievous grin spread across her face when he gaped at her in frustration. She rushed to continue, apparently deciding to put House out of his misery. "No, this wasn't my first time getting high."

"Interesting," House sneered, feeling his confidence return as he prepared his retort. "You don't fit the image of a stereotypical pothead."

"I left my bong at home." she grinned and House was surprised to find himself grinning back in response.

What the fuck was wrong with him? He glanced discreetly at the label on his bottle of vicodin before shoving it back in his pocket.

If Wilson had slipped anti-depressants into his stash, he was in for one serious ass whopping.

"So," House cleared his throat, averting her gaze as he limped forward and grabbed her chart off he foot of the bed. "Your seizure likely wasn't caused by the weed you were smoking…"

"Of course it wasn't," Alexis replied, looking at him as though he had taken the short bus to work. "One of the reasons I smoke marijuana is because it usually helps to control my seizures."

"You have epilepsy." House surmised, sighing in frustration as he realized he'd been duped.

"And you have a limp," Lexie stated, eyes sparkling with mischief as House glared at her irritably. "Sorry. I thought we were comparing disabilities."

"Well, as much as I'd love to stick around chat, I've got better things to do." House declared as he began limping towards the door. He had a bone to pick with Cuddy.

"So do I," Alexis called out after him, waiting until he begrudgingly turned to face her before continuing. "So I would appreciate it if you could hurry up and discharge me already so I can get the hell out of here."

"I don't do paperwork," House informed her curtly as he turned back around and head towards the door. "But I'll get someone to help you out with that."

"Thanks, Dr…?"

"House." he replied, glancing back at her from the doorway.

"Dr. House." the girl repeated softly before closing her eyes and letting her head fall back against the pillows.

It was the familiar sound of his name on her lips that finally made House realize who Alexis Wainwright reminded him of.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Cuddy!" House bellowed loudly down the crowded hallway of Princeton Plainsborough Teaching Hospital and nearly everyone in the vicinity turned to glare at him in shock - everyone except the Dean of Medicine who purposely chose to ignore his childish outburst as she continued signing patient forms at the nurse's station.

"Even a dog knows enough to come when it's called." House sneered and Cuddy was surprised to look up and discover that he was now standing directly beside her, crowding her personal space as usual.

"Would you keep your voice down." Cuddy hissed before turning her attention back to the file she had been reviewing.

"You tricked me." House declared, sounding mildly impressed but even more irritated as he reached out and grabbed the pen out of Lisa's hand so that she had no choice but to look at him.

"I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about." Cuddy replied, trying not to grin and failing miserably.

"The epileptic stoner you pawned off on me this morning." House continued, obviously pleased with himself now that he had her undivided attention.

"Alexis Wainwright?" Cuddy asked, feigning ignorance. "What about her?"

"You conveniently failed to mention that she had already been diagnosed." House replied, glaring at her accusingly.

"You didn't ask." Cuddy reasoned, sighing in resignation when he gave her The Look. "In case you haven't noticed, the hospital is swamped right now with the influx of patients from Mercy West. So I just figured that since you weren't doing anything productive, I could trick you into helping out a bit." she explained rationally, grinning at the look of skepticism on his face. "Plus, I wanted you to meet her."

"Why?" House inquired, eyebrow raised suspiciously - though Cuddy could tell that by the look on his face that he had already figured it out.

"Doesn't she remind you of someone?" Lisa grinned.

"Wavy dark brown hair, piercing blue eyes and in need of a serious attitude adjustment …" House listed off the young girl's many attributes as he looked Cuddy up and down as if assessing her height and weight in comparison to Alexis. "I didn't know you were in the market for a stunt double."

"What?" Cuddy's brow furrowed in confusion and she shook her head to clear it. "No, not me…" she explained, surprised that he hadn't made the connection "You!"

"I beg your pardon?" House replied indignantly.

"Oh come on, she's you with a vagina." Lisa declared, blushing slightly when her crass choice of words drew a few curious glances from people passing by.

"I think I'm insulted," House gasped, grinning lasciviously at her mention of the female anatomy. "And a little turned on."

"You seriously didn't recognize the similarities between the two of you?" Cuddy asked, surprised at him for being so obtuse.

"Have you been toking up as well?" House teased , leaning in closer as he pretended to check her pupils for dilation. "I think even Stevie Wonder would be able to see that there are absolutely no similarities to be found between myself and a teenage girl."

"Funny," Lisa replied coyly, her gaze unwavering as his face hovered mere inches away from her own. "That sounds like something she would say."

"Excuse me?" an elderly woman interrupted their standoff as she cautiously approached the nurse's station.

"What?" House barked, annoyed at the intrusion. Cuddy glared at him in warning before she turned to face the older woman, offering her an apologetic smile.

"I was wondering if you could tell me which room Alexis Wainwright is in?" the woman asked timidly, her question directed at Cuddy this time. "I was told she had been admitted sometime yesterday afternoon."

"You must be her foster mother, Mrs…" Cuddy trailed off, glancing down at the young girl's chart after snatching it up from the pile of papers behind her. "Miller is it?"

"Yes," the woman nodded in affirmation. "I would have gotten here sooner, but I was at work."

"Aren't you a bit long in the tooth to still be slaving away in the working world?"

"House!" Cuddy hissed, slapping his shoulder in reprimand.

"Retirement doesn't appeal to me," Mrs. Miller explained nonchalantly. "I like to keep myself busy."

"I'm sure Dr. Cuddy here can relate to that." House chimed in, his voice deceivingly polite.

"I was actually just about to sign off on your daughter's discharge papers," Lisa explained, ignoring House's subtle jab at her workaholic nature. "So you can follow me and I'll take you to her room."

"Thank you." Mrs. Miller replied and the two women began making their way down the hall, Lisa grabbing House by the wrist and pulling him along when he made a move to head in the opposite direction.

"I apologize for Dr. House," Cuddy sighed, letting go of his wrist once she was fairly certain that he wouldn't try and escape again. " He's…"

"A handful, I'm sure." the elderly woman interjected, a knowing smile on her thin lips. "It's perfectly alright, I'm used to it." she explained casually. "Alexis is the same way."

"Here we are," Cuddy declared as she stopped in front of the girl's hospital room, grinning triumphantly at House who scowled in response. She pushed open the door and the three of them stepped inside the room. "I just need to go over a few things with you both and then…"

"Oh my God, what's wrong with her?!" Mrs. Miller gasped as House and Cuddy simultaneously rushed to the girl's bedside. "Is she having another seizure?"

"House, get a team in here stat! She's crashing," Cuddy instructed, her adrenaline kicking in as she frantically tried to still the girl's convulsing body so that she could get an accurate reading of her heart rate. The heart monitor had somehow been disconnected, which would explain why the code blue alarm hadn't sounded. Cuddy noted that the patient's breath was dangerously shallow and there was a white coating of foam around her mouth - symptoms that were inconsistent with that of a typical grand mal seizure. Something wasn't right. "House!"

"Get the saline solution," he replied, his voice eerily devoid of emotion as he began limping towards the door. "She needs her stomach pumped."

"She's ODing?" Cuddy asked in confusion, realization dawning as the girl's symptoms began to add up. "On what?"

And that's when she saw it.

House's empty bottle of vicodin pills lay ominously on the floor beside the girl's bed.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_A/N: I apologize for what I am sure are the many medical inaccuracies found in this chapter. I'm not a doctor - nor do I play one on tv._


	3. Chapter 3

-1_A/N: Thanks so much for all the reviews you guys! They really help to speed up the writing process, so keep 'em coming! )_

Chapter Three:

"How is she?" Mrs. Miller asked when the dean of medicine finally reemerged from the hospital room.

"Her condition is stabilized," Cuddy explained, sighing in exhaustion as she ran a hand through her hair in frustration. "We were forced to perform a gastric lavage procedure in order to extract the narcotics from her system. It's really too early to tell, but I expect her to make a full recovery."

"Thank God," the elderly woman sighed in relief as she sat back down in the uncomfortable waiting room chair. "But, I don't understand. How did she manage to get a hold of that many vicodin pills in the first place?"

"My guess is that she stole them from Dr. House when he was in her room earlier," Cuddy explained cautiously, reluctant to say any anything that might implicate House in yet another lawsuit. "Mrs. Miller, I can assure you that…"

"Don't worry, I have no intention of suing." the older woman assured her. "It isn't your fault that Alexis wants to kill herself."

"Has your daughter ever tried to commit suicide before?" Cuddy asked gently as she sat down beside the elderly woman, trying not to sound as though she was insinuating anything.

"Once," Mrs. Miller replied, her voice hoarse with unshed tears. "I came home one night and found her lying in the bathtub with her head submerged underwater. I immediately pulled her out and performed CPR until she coughed up a mouthful of water and started breathing again. When I questioned her about it later, she claimed to have simply fallen asleep in the tub - but I always had my suspicions."

"How long has Alexis been living with you?" Lisa asked, her voice warm with compassion.

"She came to me when she was twelve," Mrs. Miller explained, her smile bittersweet as she began to reminisce. "Such a troubled young girl, but I could tell that all she needed was someone patient and caring enough to deal with her…unique personality."

"She seemed happy," Cuddy blurted out distractedly, her voice barely above a whisper. "When I first met her yesterday, she seemed happy."

"Oh, she has good days and bad days." Mrs. Miller nodded, blinking back tears. "I hear she was stoned when they brought her in, so it must have been one of the good days."

"So you're aware of her drug use then?" Cuddy asked, surprised by the elderly woman's frankness.

"Yes, and I don't condone it." Mrs. Miller explained defensively. "But it does seem to help keep her epilepsy under control, and after everything she's been through I figure she deserves some relief every now and then."

"I understand." Cuddy sighed. She knew better than anyone what it was like to stand by and watch as someone you cared about self medicated themselves half to death.

"But apparently even the marijuana isn't enough to make her happy anymore." the other woman declared sadly. Cuddy watched, feeling helpless as Mrs. Miller bent forward and buried her face in her hands. "I don't think I can do this."

"What do you mean?" Lisa asked, straining to hear what the elderly woman was saying. She was speaking so softly, as though she were afraid that someone might overhear what she was about to say.

"I'm getting old, Dr. Cuddy." Mrs. Miller sighed in defeat, lifting her head to meet Cuddy's gaze. "Maybe…maybe Alexis would be better off living with someone else."

"Mrs. Miller, I really don't think that now is the time to be making any rash decisions." Lisa tried desperately to reason with her. "Alexis needs you now more than ever."

"She doesn't need me," the elderly woman declared, getting up from her seat as she prepared to leave. "And I don't need this."

"Mrs. Miller, wait!"

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Dishes shook and a box of Uncle Ben's two minute rice fell to the floor as House opened and then immediately closed the cupboards in his kitchen, searching vainly for something unhealthy to gorge himself on. Crackers, an empty can of CheeseWiz, Hamburger Helper, moldy pita bread…Why the fuck was there never anything good to eat in his apartment?

He should have gone to Wilson's.

Sighing in defeat, House abandoned his impromptu junk food hunt as he limped back into the living room and flopped down on the couch - wincing when his knee collided with the coffee table.

"Fuck!" he hissed, rubbing his leg to try and alleviate the stabbing pain. Reaching underneath the couch cushions, House pulled out a spare bottle of vicodin that he kept there for emergencies such as this. Popping open the lid with one hand, he brought the bottle towards his mouth and prepared to dry swallow a few pills when all of a sudden the image of Alexis Wainwright's convulsing body assaulted his memory. His hand clenched tightly around the tiny plastic bottle until he felt it begin to crack under the pressure. Growling in frustration, he whipped it across the room and continued rubbing his leg.

He needed a drink.

"House?" a familiar voice bellowed from the hallway, followed by a series of loud wraps against his front door. "House, are you in there?"

"No!" he yelled in response, rolling his eyes in frustration and wishing that she'd just go away.

"House, it's me." Cuddy declared unnecessarily. "Open the door."

"I'm sorry. Dr. Gregory House, esteemed diagnostician and all around stud muffin isn't home right now. But if you'd like to leave your name, number and bra size, he'll get back to you as soon as poss…where the hell did you get that?"

"I'm not at liberty to say." Cuddy grinned conspicuously, dangling the pilfered house key in her hand as she closed the door to his apartment and sauntered into the room.

"Ahh, evasiveness. A sure fire sign that you're hiding something juicy." House derived analytically. "What, did you track down Cameron and mud wrestle her for it or something?"

"Ummm, no." Cuddy replied, eyebrow raised in suspicion and House could tell that she was surprised to learn that Cameron had a key to his apartment. My, my, my, Dr. Cuddy. Jealousy looks good on you.

"Flashed your funbags at the building superintendent?" House leered, his gaze dropping to admire the bags of fun in question.

"House…" Cuddy sighed impatiently.

"That leaves only one other possible explanation," he rationalized, looking up to meet her gaze as he grinned triumphantly. "Wilson."

"Way to solve the case, Sherlock." Cuddy applauded, completely unimpressed by his process of elimination. The grin on House's face slowly faded and was replaced by his usual scowl of discontentment when he saw her gaze fell upon his leg . He was still absentmindedly rubbing the damn thing, trying to make the throbbing go away - but it wasn't working.

"How's your leg?" Cuddy finally asked and House could tell by the strain in her voice that she had been debating whether or not to voice her concern. He wished she hadn't.

"Fine." he lied, the overtly cheerful tone of his voice was laced with sarcasm. "Ya know, except for the missing thigh muscle and excruciating pain."

"Have you taken anything for it?" Cuddy asked worriedly and he didn't miss the startled look on her face when she noticed the broken bottle of vicodin that lay on the floor, little white pills scattered all around it.

"I would, but some suicidal little brat decided to steal my stash and throw herself a party for one." House sneered, hoping that his callous remark would shock her into silence. He should have known better.

"What happened today," Cuddy began, her voice so soft and gentle that House practically had to strain in order to hear her next words. "It wasn't your fault…"

"No shit." he abruptly cut her off, his voice sounding far too loud in comparison to her much softer tone. "Why the hell would it be my fault? It's not like I gave the kid my pills and told her to try and off herself."

"Greg…" she whispered, taking a step closer to him with tears in her eyes.

"Don't." he hissed, raising a hand to halt her movements. He couldn't do this right now, not with her. Not when she was looking at him as though his cat had just died and she was the one responsible for running the stupid thing over.

"I know you're upset…"

"You're damn right I'm upset!" House yelled in frustration, using anger to mask the unexplainable sense of guilt that had been slowly consuming him ever since the _incident _had occurred. "That was nearly a full bottle of vicodin she wasted on this little failed suicide attempt of hers." he sneered, averting her gaze before mumbling: "Hydrocodone and acetaminophen don't grow on trees ya know."

Cuddy chuckled, shaking her head in amusement.

"What?" House grumbled, looking up at her in confusion. That wasn't exactly the reaction he was expecting. But then again, Lisa had never been one for predictability.

"Nothing." she replied, smiling at him knowingly and House was frustrated to realize that, despite his best efforts to appear nonchalant , Cuddy could tell that what happened to Alexis had upset him far more than he was willing to admit.

"I'll see you tomorrow." Cuddy whispered as she prepared to leave.

"Lisa." House blurted out, though for the life of him he had no idea why. All he knew was that suddenly, inexplicably…he didn't want her to leave. She was staring at him, eyebrow raised in question.

"I'm hungry." he mumbled, inwardly wincing at his own stupidity. He was about to say something else, something that actually made sense - but then he saw the smile on her face as she shrugged off her jacket and reached for the phone.

"Pepperoni and mushroom?" she asked knowingly, already dialing the familiar number.

"I guess." he replied, feigning disinterest when really - the prospect of pigging out on greasy pizza with his favorite dean of medicine was exactly what the doctor ordered.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Dr. Lisa Cuddy strode confidently down the halls of Princeton Plainsboro, head held high as she tried to ignore the curious glances that were being thrown her way by those who were attentive enough to notice she was still wearing yesterday's clothes.

After eating way too much pizza and watching old reruns of All In The Family, Lisa had eventually fallen asleep. In House's apartment, on his couch, with her head resting comfortably against his broad shoulder. When she had woken up six hours later, already dangerously late for work, she was relieved to discover that House was still fast asleep. Lisa could only imagine the grief he would have given her for spending the night curled up against his side on the warn leather couch. In fact, she wouldn't be surprised if he had the nameplate on her office door changed to: Dr. Lisa Cuddles.

Cuddy was so lost in her own thoughts that she nearly crashed into the frazzled looking woman who stood in front of Alexis Wainwright's hospital room.

"Sorry, I didn't see you there." Cuddy apologized, glancing at her suspiciously when she realized that the other woman had just been in her patient's room. "Are you here to see Ms. Wainwright?"

"Yes, actually. I just spoke with her." the rather portly woman explained before introducing herself. "My name's Caroline Adler, I'm from Children's Services. And you are?"

"Dr. Lisa Cuddy," she replied, glancing over the other woman's shoulder to check on the young girl. She was propped up in bed, her gaze directed out the window and even from a distance Cuddy could see the tears in her eyes. "May I ask why you're here to see Alexis?"

"I'm the social worker assigned to her case," Ms. Adler explained. "My office received a call from Mrs. Miller last night and given the young girl's recent behavior, she has requested that Alexis be removed from her home."

"I see," Cuddy sighed, saddened by the elderly woman's decision to abandon the young girl when she was already so emotionally unstable. "Have you found a home for her yet?"

"No," Caroline admitted regretfully. "Not many families are willing to become foster parents for teenagers, especially ones with a history of drug use."

"So what's going to happen to her?" Cuddy asked worriedly, still gazing at Alexis with concern.

"Honestly?" Ms. Adler replied, smiling sadly as she prepared to leave. "I don't know."

"I'll look after her." Cuddy blurted out impulsively, finally tearing her gaze away from the troubled teen.

"I beg your pardon?" the social worker gasped, turning back to look at her in surprise. Cuddy nervously cleared her throat, taking a deep breath to try and gather her resolve.

"I'll be Alexis's new foster mom."


	4. Chapter 4

-1_A/N: Sorry it took me a bit longer than usual to update this story, been really busy with school this week. But this chapter is a bit longer than the previous ones, so hopefully that'll make up for it. Thanks again for all the awesome reviews, you guys rock! Oh, and for everyone who expects for this story to end up being a lesson in predictability - I hope to prove you wrong. ;-)_

_Enjoy!_

Chapter Four:

_Two weeks later…_

"She's not in her office." House declared abruptly as he sat down across from Wilson in the busy cafeteria.

"Who?" the oncologist asked in confusion, watching as his roast beef sandwich was stolen right off his plate.

"Hilary Rodham Clinton." House replied sarcastically, rolling his eyes in frustration as he took a bite out of his newly acquired sandwich. "What do you mean _who_? Cuddy!"

"Would you please try and refrain from talking with your mouth full," Wilson admonished, brushing damp pieces of meat and bread off his lab coat before glaring at House in disgust. "And last time I checked, Cuddy was permitted to leave the confines of her office whenever she pleases."

"She's been going home at lunch these past few days," House continued, ignoring his friend's advice as he continued chewing. "Even took a day off last week."

"And this concerns you how exactly?" Wilson sighed, obviously not as interested in their boss's work schedule as House seemed to be.

"It's unprofessional!" he reasoned, tossing the sandwich back down on Wilson's plate as he ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "She's the dean of medicine, remember? What if I need her to sign off on a surgery or something?"

"Sounds to me like somebody misses his Cuddy." Wilson concluded, a knowing grin on his face as he casually popped a french fry into his mouth.

"And it sounds to me like somebody is trying to compensate for his own lack of a love life by speculating about mine." House sneered, reaching across the table to grab Wilson's plate of fries.

"You have a love life?" Wilson questioned mockingly as he snatched the bottle of Heinz out of the condiments basket so that House couldn't use it, grinning victoriously at the scowl on his friend's face. "So I guess the rumors are true then."

"What rumors?" House sneered, over-salting his fries to make up for the lack of ketchup.

"Well, word on the street is that Cuddy spent the night at your place a few weeks ago." Wilson declared coyly, eyebrow raised in question. "Care to confirm?"

"On exactly which street is this word being spread?" House groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance. He only enjoyed being the subject of hospital rumors when he was the one who started them.

"Third floor nurses station," Wilson replied casually as he took a sip of his drink. "Amy Pawlak, she's a nurse in the pediatrics ward. She also happens to live two blocks away from you and noticed Cuddy's car parked in your driveway at 4am when she was out for her morning run."

"What kind of freak goes jogging at 4 o'clock in the morning?" House sneered in disgust, making a mental note to pay this nurse Pawlak a little visit. "And do you make a habit of gossiping with the girls down on the third floor? Because seriously, between this and your sudden interest in daytime television, I'm beginning to have serious doubts about your heterosexuality…"

"I notice that you aren't denying anything," Wilson pointed out, his eyes widening in realization at his friend's continued silence. "Oh my God, so Amy was right. Cuddy really did spend the night at your apartment."

"Why do I feel like I'm stuck in a _really _bad episode of Degrassi?" House groaned.

"You're avoiding the question," Wilson noted, squinting his eyes suspiciously. "Which usually means you've got something to hide."

"Nothing happened. We just…" House sighed, shifting uncomfortably in his seat as he tried vainly to act nonchalant. "Fell asleep watching tv."

"Wow." Wilson replied, his lips twitching with the effort it took not to laugh. "That's kind of adorable."

"Shut up." House growled, whipping a french fry at his friend's head in response.

"Now I see what's really going on here," Wilson surmised, tapping his chin inquisitively. "You're jealous."

"You know Wilson, you've really gotta stop watching those Spanish soap operas you're suddenly so fond of." House sneered. "Because in the real world, not everything in life is fueled by deep-seated feelings of jealousy and lust."

"Okay, A) they're telenovelas, not soap operas. B) I never said anything about lust, but thanks for that little tidbit of information." Wilson smirked knowingly and House glared at him in response. "And C) I meant that you're jealous of Alexis."

"Yeah, I'm jealous of a pot smoking teenage girl with no parents who can't even manage to successfully kill herself." House snarked before shoving the last remaining french fry into his mouth. "That makes perfect sense."

"It does actually," Wilson grinned, confident in his suspicions. "You're jealous of Alexis because she has the one thing that you don't."

"Acne?" House sneered, using the hook of his cane to reach across the table and snag Wilson's root beer.

"No. Cuddy." the oncologist declared, chuckling when House discovered that the cup was nearly empty. "No more sleepovers now that Cuddy has a teenage daughter to look after."

"She's _not _her daughter," House argued, his voice rising higher than he had intended it to. Ignoring the curious look on Wilson's face that his little outburst had caused, House cleared his throat and continued. "Which is exactly why Cuddy's decision to foster the little brat makes absolutely no sense."

"What are you talking about? It makes perfect sense." Wilson reasoned. "Cuddy wanted a child…"

"No, she wanted a _baby_. Her own, biological bundle of joy." House argued, visions of Cuddy bent over her desk as he injected fertility drugs into her gorgeous behind assaulted his memory before he shook his head slightly in an effort to clear it. "If adopting was an option for her, she would have went that route a long time ago."

"What exactly are you getting at, House?" Wilson sighed impatiently, making it clear that he was quickly losing interest in their conversation.

"There has to be some reason why Cuddy is so attached to this kid," House reasoned, his brow furrowed in concentration as he tried to come up with an explanation that made sense. "Why is she so willing to open up her home to someone that she barely even knows?"

"Because unlike you, Cuddy actually has a heart and helping out a child in need doesn't require an ulterior motive on her part." Wilson stated matter-of-factly, sighing when the look on House's face made it clear that he wasn't buying it. Obviously he was looking for a more dramatic explanation. "Oooo, I know! Maybe sixteen years ago, Cuddy had a torrid affair with some nameless stud and the two of them conceived a child together. Of course she later discovered that said stud was married, so to avoid the public humiliation of becoming an unwed mother, Cuddy was forced to hide her pregnancy and give the child up for adoption. And now, years later, the Gods of fate have conspired to reunite mother and daughter in foster care bliss."

"Hm." House replied after a few moments of silence as he contemplated the scenario, mentally doing the math to see if his suspicions were correct. He had a faraway look on his face, nodding his head slightly as though what Wilson had just said made absolute, perfect sense.

What the fuck?

"Okay, I think _you're _the one whose been watching too many soap operas." Wilson chuckled nervously, unnerved by his friend's uncharacteristic behavior. "There's nothing to indicate that Cuddy even has a secret love child, and even if there was some remote chance that she did, it would be statistically improbable for that child to end up being Alexis."

"Improbable," House declared, getting up from his seat and ignoring Wilson's curious glance as he limped his way out of the room. "But not impossible."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Hey! I brought home a pizza, so I hope you're hungry." Lisa bellowed as she entered her home and closed the door behind her, struggling not to trip over her own feet as she carefully made her way into the living room - her hands full of movie night goodies. "And Blockbuster was sold out of The Devil Wears Prada, so I figured we could just…who the hell are you?"

Cuddy stopped dead in her tracks when she entered the room and discovered that Alexis had company.

"Lexie, you didn't tell me that your new foster mom was such a hottie." the teenage boy sneered lasciviously, looking Cuddy up and down as he lounged on the sofa with his arm around Alexis. "Definitely an improvement from Mrs. Miller's saggy old ass."

"Jason." the young girl hissed admonishingly, throwing an apologetic glance in Cuddy's direction.

"Who are you and what are you doing in my house?" Lisa demanded authoritatively, glaring at the little punk as she placed the pizza down on a nearby table so that her hands were free to slap the shit eating grin off his face if need be.

"I'm Lexie's boyfriend," he declared, his arm tightening around the young girl possessively as he propped his feet up on the coffee table and glared at Cuddy in contempt. "Just thought I'd come by and check out the new digs."

"Yes, well now that Alexis has given you the grand tour of my living room sofa…" Lisa sneered, giving Alexis a look of disapproval before directing her attention to Jason once more. "I want you to leave. _Now_."

"My, my, my, Dr. Cuddy." the young man taunted her condescendingly as he got up from the couch, making a point of letting Cuddy see him zip up his fly so that there would be no doubt in her mind as to what the two of them had been up to before she walked in. "For such a sophisticated woman, you sure don't know much about manners."

"Jason, just go." Alexis sighed in frustration from her seat on the couch. "I'll call you later."

"Oh, so now you want me to leave too?" Jason barked incredulously, his voice rising in pitch as he glared angrily down at the young girl. "I guess you think you're too good for someone like me now that you're shacked up with Ms. Money Bags over there."

"You're overreacting," Alexis declared as she stood up from the couch , crossing her arms in front of her chest defensively. "And quite frankly, I'm beginning to find these little temper tantrums of yours incredibly unattractive."

"You're a real fucking bitch, ya know that?" Jason sneered, taking a step closer to her.

"Alright, that's enough." Cuddy intervened loudly, causing both teens to glance in her direction as she picked up the cordless phone. "If you're not out of my house in five seconds, I'm calling the police."

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Jason warned, his voice menacing as he slowly began walking towards her. Cuddy stood her ground, thankful for the four-inch heels she was wearing because it took away the young punk's height advantage and they were at eye level with each other.

"Oh, really?" Cuddy declared, eyebrow raised in defiance as she glared at the teen - trying not to let him intimidate her. "And why is that?"

"Because I know where you live," Jason replied casually, his voice barely above a whisper as he reached out to stroke her cheek with the tip of his index finger. "I know where you work," he continued and Cuddy tried vainly to suppress the shudder of disgust that wracked through her body as his warm breath hit her face. "And if I get in trouble with the cops again because your pretty little ass decided to stick her nose where it doesn't belong, you'll be the first person I visit once I'm out on bail."

"Is that a threat?" Cuddy hissed, grabbing his wrist when he made a move to stroke her other cheek.

"No." he declared simply, pulling his hand out of her grasp as he slipped passed her and made his way towards the door. "It's a promise."

Both women sighed in relief when they were certain that he was finally gone. Cuddy went to lock the door, even throwing on the deadbolt for good measure before making her way back into the living.

"What did I tell you about having boys in the house when I'm not around?" Lisa admonished the young girl, hands on her slender hips as she surveyed the damage done to her living room. There were empty beer cans strewn all over the place, McDonalds hamburger wrappers sticking out from in between her couch cushions, and there was an ashtray filled with cigarette butts and what looked suspiciously like the end of a spliff.

"I know, I'm sorry." Alexis apologized distractedly as she sat back down on the couch and reached for the remote. "It won't happen again."

"You're damn right it won't." Lisa hissed, grabbing the remote control out of the girl's hand and switching the tv back off. The teen sighed and looked up at Cuddy impatiently. "Alexis, what were you thinking?"

"Look, it's no big deal." Lexie reasoned, shrugging her shoulders indifferently. "I hadn't seen Jason in a while and he just wanted to come over and make sure that I was alright."

"Oh yeah, he really seems like the caring type." Cuddy replied disbelievingly.

"He isn't usually like that," Alexis argued, tucking an errant strand of dark brown hair behind her ear as she averted Lisa's gaze. "You just upset him…"

"I upset _him_?!" Cuddy yelled indignantly as she paced the messy room. "Well excuse me for not being more hospitable to the rude, unwelcome guest who had the nerve to threaten me in my own home."

"He didn't mean anything by it," Alexis reassured her, though she didn't sound very convinced. "He's not that type of guy."

"You mean the type of guy who doesn't even come to visit his so called 'girlfriend' in the hospital?" Cuddy shot back accusingly.

"He was busy…" Alexis reasoned.

"Oh, but he's not too busy to come over for a booty call." Lisa sneered, then wished she hadn't.

"If you want me to leave, just say so!" Lexie shouted, reaching up to brush away the tears that had begun to well up in her eyes. "I never asked you to take me in anyway. The last thing I need is to be a charity case for some rich chick who thinks she has the right to judge me."

"I'm not judging you," Cuddy sighed, running a hand through her hair in frustration as she moved to sit beside the young girl. "I'm just asking for a little respect, that's all. For me, and more importantly, for yourself."

"You think I don't have any self-respect?" Lexie asked, arms folded defensively across her chest as she glared at Lisa and waited to hear her response.

"If you did, I doubt you'd be hanging out with guys like Jason." Cuddy reasoned, her voice soft and gentle as she tried to convince the young girl that her boyfriend was bad news. "You're a beautiful, intelligent girl. You deserve so much better than this."

Her words seemed to shock the young girl into silence, the only sound in the room was the ticking of the clock and the occasional hitching breath from Alexis. It broke Cuddy's heart to realize that the girl had probably never had anyone to remind her of her own self worth before.

"You're right," Lexie whispered, so quietly that Cuddy wasn't sure if she had really spoken at all until she repeated the words, more forcefully this time. "I know you're right, it's just….I've always had a thing for bad boys. As lame and clichédéd as that sounds."

"Oh, I can definitely relate to that." Cuddy chuckled, thinking of the 'bad boy' in her life that she just couldn't seem to stay away from either. "But this Jason really seems like he's bad news and I think it might be best if you didn't see him anymore. At least not while you're still recovering."

"I feel a lot better, honestly." Alexis declared, nodding her head as if to assure herself as well as Cuddy.

"Alexis, people just don't instantly snap out of depression." Lisa explained, trying not to sound too much like a doctor.

"You think I'm still suicidal," Lexie sighed and the inquisitive look on her face reminded Cuddy so much of House that she literally had to do a double take. "That's why you keep coming home in the middle of the day - to make sure I'm not hanging from the ceiling or face down in the tub..."

"Lexie, that's not true." Lisa argued halfheartedly.

"Isn't it?" Alexis reasoned and Cuddy had to avert her gaze, unable to look the young girl in the eye for fear of the guilt that was likely written all over her face. Of course she was worried about Lexie's mental stability, and given the teen's recent behavior, Cuddy believed that her fears were completely justified. When she had agreed to become Alexis's foster mother, she had become responsible for the young girl's safety and well being - both legally and emotionally. If anything were to happen to her…

"I won't try and kill myself again." Lexie whispered, reaching for the remote again and switching on the tv. "I promise."

It was then that Lisa was struck by another glaring similarity between Alexis and House.

They were both terrible liars.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Cuddy sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration as she stared down at the mountain of paperwork in front of her. She had left the house an hour ago once Alexis had fallen asleep, intent on going into the office to try and catch up on all the work she'd missed over the past two weeks. It was starting to seem more and more like an impossible task though. She wasn't even half way through the pile of forms she needed to sign and already her eyes were beginning to blur.

Groaning in resignation, Cuddy grabbed her briefcase off the floor and began stuffing it full of paperwork. Maybe she'd be able to accomplish more by working from home - preferably after a nice warm bath and a few hours of much needed sleep. Getting up from her seat, Cuddy began gathering up the rest of her things as she prepared to leave.

It was then that she heard the door to her office open slowly.

"Go away, House." Cuddy sighed in mock frustration, not even bothering to look up from what she was doing because she knew instinctively that he would be the only person crazy enough to darken her doorstep at this time of night. He didn't answer her though, but she heard the door shut and lock firmly behind him.

"House, seriously. It's late, I'm tired and I just want to go home." Cuddy moaned with exhaustion, eyes widening in shock when a hand closed over her mouth.

"You aren't going anywhere, bitch." a vaguely familiar voice hissed menacingly in her ear and she felt something cold and sharp press painfully against her neck. "And don't even think about trying to scream for help because I'll slit your throat so damn fast, I'll be gone before your body hits the floor."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

TBC


End file.
